You’ve found your soulmate, congratulations! Now it’s time to put a ring on it – literally.

And that can be the most stressful part about asking if you’re sure they’ll say yes. The perfect engagement ring isn’t an “it was there so I bought it type of thing”.

There are research and planning – along with some money saving you’ll have to do first. Here are some tips for picking the perfect ring.

1. Throw Old Rules Out the Window

There’s a wives tale or urban legend (whatever you want to call it) that an engagement ring needs to cost three months salary. If you can spend that much, cool – but if you can’t – don’t fret.

There are plenty of options for people that can’t spend a lot right now. Especially now that we’re moving away from classic diamonds.

The stone Morganite has a very similar depth to diamonds and is clear, with a slight tone of pink. It’s about a third of the carat price, so you can get a bigger stone for less.

You should spend what you can on a ring – and planning is key. If you look closely enough, there are choices somewhere between $500 and $5,000 on most sites.

2. Quality Matters

While your partner, if they’re that kind of person, probably wants a sizeable carat, they also want a high-quality stone. A low-quality diamond doesn’t have the kind of prismatic light-bending effects as a high-clarity stone.

And that clarity is what people are really talking about when they say “it’s so sparkly!” when cooing over a ring.

If your budget allows for a 1 quality diamond, but the clarity and cut of the stone are low quality- go smaller. Half and quarter carats are still impressive, and the better quality stone, the less the size matters.

3. Check Pinterest

If you’re marrying a woman who grew up in the internet age, chances are she has a Pinterest. He might have one too – but it’s less likely he has an entire board for his weddings.

Many women have boards called “wedding inspiration” sometimes the board is locked – which means they have to be signed in.

If there’s no such board, look under jewelry or any other relevant boards. Even if you don’t see any rings, you’ll get a better idea of her style.

What’s Pinterest? If you don’t understand the platform, think of boards as categories – but with pictures you can click on.

4. Silver or Gold?

This is another time you can look to your partners existing jewelry for hints on what they like. Most people have a favorite metal, either silver or gold.

People with bluer skin tones (think blondes and redheads) usually look better in silver. The warmer the skin tone, the better gold looks – at least that’s what the magazines used to teach us.

Her current collection – not her skin tone – will tell you which metal to go with.

5. Get the Right Size

Finally, you need to get a ring that’s going to gracefully slide on their finger when it’s time to pop the question. To figure out their ring size, you can borrow one of their rings (that they wear) and bring it to the jeweler.

If you don’t feel comfortable with that, you can get creative. Get a container of playdough or some other shape-holding material. Give the ring a quick push into the surface and make sure the imprint doesn’t get squished.

Or just trace the size on a piece of paper. The jeweler can figure out the size from there. Click here to learn what else a good jeweler can do.

The Perfect Engagement Ring: Shopping Done Right

Now that you know how to look for the perfect engagement ring, you have a much better chance of avoiding this sad situation. You don’t want to be the laughing stock of Facebook – that’s not a strong start to a marriage.

Follow these tips and plan your proposal out first. Then let your love and charm do the rest.

Need some tips on proposing? We’ve got you.